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Comment on American Boy || Chapter 2 by Staples

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Comment on Setting the Artisan Deco Luggage Strap Combination Lock by ♥ cosmochick ♥

♥ cosmochick ♥ — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 19:04:07 +0000

My luggage is a converted fiberglass toolcase modified to take the shoulder strap from a Sony BetaCam Camera and it's nearly indestructable… and it fits under the seat in ANY airliner.

You DO know the airlines are charging for baggages now…. right?… typically $15 ro $25 for the first bag… $50 to $100 for the second bag and $150 or more for the third bag… and that will probably go up in the future.

Comment on American Boy || Chapter 2 by ♥ Yaoi is love ♥

♥ Yaoi is love ♥ — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 14:56:18 +0000

hey! r u adding vamppires??? i jsu watched vampire knight and that was really cool! maybe u r doin a little vampire vs cat? that would be cool… and i was wondering does naomi like suchibi? coz she dressed up so niciely for him i was thinking she would jus wear sum jeans or sumthin hmm…. anywaz i really like this part coz u seemed to add a litlle mystery in this one! so i give it a ….10! congrates
hope u continue to write!

Comment on American Boy || Chapter 2 by (= Baylie Brookerz =)

(= Baylie Brookerz =) — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 13:06:22 +0000

I read a good portion of this, but not all. It seems to me that you are writing about some things you don't know, like four-year old girls (any children around that age), and motels, and perhaps time.

Examples: children that age aren't 'lazy' or 'lying around a lot.' Not at all. Also, there is no way a four-year old could have been in all those different places and even remember them enough for you to write something like 'she didn't want to live somewhere for a whole year.' Kendra would barely know what a whole year feels like.

Also: there are lots of extra 'y' s on words (especially the word 'the'), and you first refer to Eliza's eyebrows as raising 'my single eyebrow'… (see how that sounds?)
And when you mention Kendra's new friend as having something to do with killing, I thought Kendra's mother killed her, not the conclusion your character makes.
And if a motel room is on the third floor, it will not have a number that starts with '1,' nor have I ever heard of any motel or hotel door having a 'cat door' in it. And why does this one?

RE: dreams, staying awake, people to search for or not… The part about each person dreaming the other's life has been almost done in, in movies at least, most recently by one which stars Emma Thompson and Will Farrell, though she is a writer writing his life.
Suggest you stick with things you know, at least in details.
Keep trying… keep practicing, and keep reading.

Comment on Setting the Artisan Deco Luggage Strap Combination Lock by Kenny

Kenny — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 09:17:51 +0000

All luggage is treated equally. And thats bad. I bought a brand new high quality piece of luggage for a trip to Greece. On the way there, one zipper tag was pulled off and on the way back the other was pulled off, rendering it useless for future vacations. The luggage handlers arent going to say "be careful…its Louis Vuitton". Theyre going to toss it into the cargo with all the nameless black bags. Luggage needs to be DURABLE NOT designer.

Comment on 2003 Chrysler Town and Country in Toledo, Findlay, Bowling, by ♥ cosmochick ♥

♥ cosmochick ♥ — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 19:02:42 +0000

My luggage is a converted fiberglass toolcase modified to take the shoulder strap from a Sony BetaCam Camera and it's nearly indestructable… and it fits under the seat in ANY airliner.